Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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