Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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