i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
