dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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