I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
