Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
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