you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize