I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
