Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
