I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize