I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize