halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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