It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I think i got beer on your cat.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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