So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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