i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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