I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
