it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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