Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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