cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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