I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
