I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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