hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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