i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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