woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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