id be glad to
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
