I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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