am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
