she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Bring me that man meat
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
