C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
