He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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