is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
