Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
