clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
