You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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