you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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