Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
