I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
