And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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