The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
