They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
i just google imaged poop.
she told me i tasted like america
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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