I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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