I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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