So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
