I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
True strength comes from lack of pants
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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