I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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