my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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