i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
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