And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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