I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
