We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
