I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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